The blue days of mine. The collection of lyrics
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I began to fight for real, I wanna
Admit that I'm a bad actress for this drama.
[Bridge]
You know, I'm not a goddamn poet.
But some things cannot be avoided
Like ugly wrinkles on the forehead,
Like differences between you and your old portrait.
I left you alone in the hut on the peak,
But otherwise, you would have left me.
This story will remain in the video vault
Because I have my own world.
And even though I'm now just an aging actress.
And you're a failed director, nameless and aimless.
We're not right for each other, I'm sorry, but
I thank you, because now I know what's right.
[Chorus]
You showed me another world,
I saw some things I haven't learned.
I'm the revenant of my story,
You're cut out of credits, I'm so sorry.
You showed me another world
And now I'm back and I'm bold
To say that this film is over.
And I'm its sole copyright holder.
The drama's over.
And it will pay off.
June of 2024
Love & Loathe
song
[Verse 1]
This summer began with my desire,
With the hope and joy of mine.
I gave it my all,
But the world is sold.
Fought with people, fought with demons,
Fought against their mad opinions.
Handled it well,
But it was hell.
[Chorus]
God, I didn't let you down.
I've created something magical,
Beautiful and kept my vow.
God, it wasn't that radical.
It defenceless and tender,
It blooms quickly and seldom.
[Verse 2]
The summer ends with morbid crying,
I feel down, but I'm still trying
To be here.
My pain, my dream.
Eternal memory to this art,
A part of it lives in my heart.
Are you still here?
Can you say clear?
[Chorus]
God, they ruined me to the ground.
I swear, I tried, I fought,
But I couldn't make a sound.
God, the world has been bought.
And so they love and loathe.
But I'll be there with my dreams and hope.
[Post-chorus]
So they love me, but they loathe.
Yes, they do, yes, they do it both.
With my dreams and my hope
The world has been, the world has been bought.
So they love me, but they loathe.
I swear, I tried, I tired, but I, but I fought.
So forgive me, please, my Lord.
Once I was innocent, the art of mine is loathed.
August of 2023
How can it be?
song
[Chorus]
How can it be real?
Blue skies, but a blue feeling.
Blue birds, but blue days.
A deep blue sea, but a deadly blue face.
[Verse 1]
In the morning you see the sunlight.
It's so warm, so happy and bright.
In the evening you see the moonlight.
But after that comes the dreary black night.
[Chorus]
How can it be right?
You live, but then you die.
You're blessed, but then you're doomed.
You win, and then you fail and lose.
[Verse 2]
When you are born, you see the world bright.
It is filled with your mother's pure love.
When you die, you see the world dark.
It is cold, empty, cruel and vile.
[Chorus]
How can it be me?
I am not happy to live.
I dream of peace in my life.
But I'm destroying my world to the ground.
[Interlude]
[Verse 3]
In the reflection of the waters
You can see the sky above us.
In the glass of high-rise buildings,
You can see it dead and twisted.
[Chorus]
How can it just be?
If I cannot be free,
If freedom doesn't come with death,
Then I don't need to pray for help.
[Interlude]
[Verse 4]
A lot of colours in your life.
Mornings, nights, the endless sky.
And the lessons you have learned.
Blue sea, blue days, blue eyes, blue world.
[Chorus]
How can it be real?
Mmmmmmm.
How can it be right?
Lalalala
[Post-chorus]
How can world be blue,
How can days be that too?
How can it be me?
How can, how can, how can it be?
April 19th, 2024
I wish I
poem
I wish I could be able to go back in time.
I wish I could only do things right.
Anyway, everything seems to be fine.
Don't worry, I will be just alright.
I failed everything, and that's true.
I was telling myself “I hate you”.
Maybe that's the reason of my loss.
Self-hypnosis is the most horrific force.
My mind is my weapon, so I fight.
My heart is the target, so I die.
When your tears fly like arrows, hitting you,
You give up, there's nothing left to do.
And I'm going to fall from the height
I have ever ever barely gained.
I'm afraid to come face to face
With rocks, cold water and huge waves.
If only I could do things right.
If only I knew how to fight.
Their voices wouldn't have been heard